Better communication applies to self talk, too

Here is one exercise to begin developing positive self-talk:

Write down some of the negative messages inside your mind.  Be specific, whenever possible, and include anyone you remember who contributed to that message.
Next, to those negative messages write down a positive truth in your life.  Don’t give up if you don’t find them quickly.  For every negative message there is positive,  keep looking until you find them.

For example, you might write, when you make a mistake, you think, “I can’t do anything right.” Right beside that negative statement, your positive message could be, “I accept my mistake and am becoming a better person.”

Positive self-talk is not self-deception, positive self-talk is about the truth, in situations and in yourself.  When negative events or mistakes happen, positive self-talk seeks to bring the positive out of the negative to help you do better, go further, or just keep moving forward.

“Bedazzling Safely: Nipple and Genital Piercing After the Fact”

Piercing is a hobby that provides an entirely new realm of expression and bodily adornment, dating back for decades. People have grown a tender affection for the art of embedding such jewelry unto the body, in various positions as well. The most popular of this kind is the earlobe piercing, and ones scattered around. Following were facial piercings upon the nose, and some lip or tongue. However, in modern times some seek to specially adorne body extremities of unconventional sorts. However, when tended poorly, piercings and jewelry upon genitalia and nipples can often lead to malicious infections and ailments. How does one prevent such unlucky occurrences when seeking to express themselves?

Aftercare for such precariously placed piercings can be delicate, as infections of these regions lead to terribly uncomfortable consequences. The art of self care for these expressions begins with the first rule of tending to any sort of wound: clean and let it be. Especially when regarding genitalia piercings. Refraining from sex until the wound heals is most effective, and speeds along the process of healing the most. However, if push comes to shove, protection of some sort, even with a monogamous partner is necessary in order to protect the wound from agitation, irritation, or otherwise. Protection is usually in the form of condoms that cover the pierced area, and otherwise. Agitated movement of the pierced area is detrimental to the healing process of piercings, no matter the part.

Washes are a common mode of sterilization and treatment for wounds, including that of typical cuts, bruises, lesions, or otherwise. There is no difference here, as piercing is the art of safe wounding in order to adorn with jewelry on the body. The best sort of rinses are sea salt and saline solutions, as these are able to sterilize the area and clean the wound, without being too strong such as soap. Prevent infections, without irritation or aggravation, no? Another tip, provided by Infinite Body Piercing Incorporated, is the use of saline rinse during urination whenever one pierces around or through the urethra for the first few days. This is a stellar treatment to reduce uncomfortable or even painful feelings of the piercing during this period of healing and time.

The last step, while you let the wound heal in its own time without irritation, and the regular application of saline or sea salt rinses, is the acknowledgement that bruises and bleeding are normal. It may seem like a sign of wrong procedure when sudden bruises or bleeding occurs in the first few days after piercing, but this is not the case and is actually perfectly normal. Be prepared for this to happen, as the body requires time to adjust and recover from this procedure, and regrow itself accordingly. If you are highly adverse to possible bruising and bleeding, consider whether piercing is right for you, and recognize that these effects are only temporary.

Piercings are a wonderful expression of self, interests, or otherwise. They are a useful too in order to accompany one’s attire and overall presentation. But, health and safety are the most important factors in any procedure such as this. Be wary, and take care of your body if you choose to make use of piercings.

Oxytocin Spray

Oxytocin Spray is a mysterious treatment surrounded in a superfluous maze of hopes and anxious inquisitiveness from researchers and clients alike. But whatever is this strange substance that has become one of the primary focuses for researchers of mental health and certain genetic disorders. It still is surrounded by plenty of unknown questions, and countless variables. After decades of research, we still somehow only manage to glean a light understanding this strange hormone known as Oxytocin, and how it affects our thinking and judgements.

The chemical of Oxytocin is still mostly misunderstood by researchers and readers alike. The hormone, thanks to an exorbitant amount of press and speculation, has been dubbed the “love hormone”. This simple, binary perspective of the hormone is not quite accurate, and leads to potential for misuse. However, before research into negative effects had been undergone, the chemical was quickly administered as a medicine for various issues such as marital problems, lack of understanding of social cues, and any other issue involving a lack of desire to associate with others. The hormone, according to Beth Azar from the American Psychology Association, is found within high concentrations inside mothers and children, adults romantically interested with one another, or in individuals within a detrimental relationship, theoretically influencing them to find connections elsewhere.

The potential positives of Oxytocin are interesting, and promising. According to researchers and supporters of the treatment, it empowers thinking processes that promote general connection, romantic interest, understanding social cues, a desire to be social, and more. It is something that can effectively aid in a number of treatments for genetic disorders, and aid one in reaching outside the comfort zone, in order to grow more and expand their perspectives.

However, there are certain negative factors that may endanger or promote risk in an individual’s wellbeing from this treatment. Oxytocin may promote desire for a relationship, however this may form into hasty decisions that result in grievous relationships. Another consequence may be the complete opposite from expected, as some patients, according to Azar, have been observed to isolate and avoid social connection as a result of the treatment. The only conclusion that can be certainly draw is that the Oxytocin Spray, much like any medicine that remotely affects the mind, may affect different people in dramatically separate ways.

Although the research may be premature, the potential benefits of Oxytocin spray are plenty. If you are interested in attempting to use the treatment, speak with your physician about using the medicine and any possible side effects it may have upon your daily life

Basic Dungeon Etiquette

Dr. Harmony’s Basic Dungeon Etiquette

Many of the rules that involve nudity and sex are dependent on the country, state, and county laws.

Communication

●  DMs have the final word on all matters within the play area, including the right to stop an unsafe or abusive scene, as well as the right to eject any participant who refuses to abide the posted rules. NO QUESTIONS ASKED. ●  If you are a D-type, it is your responsibility to lead by the example of being polite in all situations. Just because you are a D-type does not make all s-types your s-type. Please respect others’ protocols. ●  Do not make assumptions about the availability of someone to play or interact with. Although there are general rules of etiquette, remember the strictness of protocol is different from D/s to D/s, thus, it is important to error on the side of High Protocol. ●  Do not touch, speak, or interact with anyone or their property without direct permission. ●  Please assume all s-types are under the protection of a D-type and ask permission from their D-type prior to interacting with the submissive. ●  Treat everyone with respect no matter the identity they hold. Do not assume that as a D-type, this identity supersedes any protocols they have negotiated with their owner. ●  In general conversation a sub, from time to time, may forget to use the honorific Sir/Ma’am and may even make another minor mistakes. If the sub is not yours, you are permitted at worst to frown to indicate you are a strict D-type. You are NOT permitted
to take to task a sub for the omission unless you have direct permission from their owner. ● When addressing s-types in conversation there are several different scenarios, some of which are indicated here: ●  The s-type is on a leash or standing behind their D-type. In this case it is rude to even acknowledge the presence of the s-type and is up to their D-type to initiate any conversation with the s-type, or not as the D-type pleases. ●  The s-type is beside or slightly between you and the D-type. Approach as if the s-type was just a chair, around the s-type. ●  Always address the D-type first and allow the D-type to introduce you to their s- type, or not as the D-type pleases. ●  If you know the s-type and you have had several previous conversations with this s-type before, even then it is rude to talk to the s-type before proper greetings are given to the D-type. Then it is always best to ask of the D-type how is their s-type doing. ●  The s-type is alone and appearing not to be with someone. Please introduce yourself and ask the s-type if they are free to talk to you. DO NOT be offended if the s-type indicates or says no. Many s-types are owned and may be under orders not to talk to strangers. ●  If for any reason you are unsure of the type of person you are talking to it is considered polite to ask. ●  As an s-type, unsure of the type of person asking you this question, the polite answer is “I belong to Sir/Mistress X, please ask his/her permission to speak to me.”
●  Negotiate ALL scenes. ●  Respect ALL limits. ●  DO NOT under any circumstances interrupt a scene or involve yourself in a scene without an invitation from the D-type. ●  Either have a negotiated safe word or agree upon the use of the universal color codes of Green, Yellow, and Red. ●  Respect the play area and use universal procedures for wet play. ●  Please disinfect and clean any equipment used. ●  Please clean up your play area following your scene. ●  Limit the use of loud noises in the play area. ●  Limit play to designated areas. ●  Never walk away from an active scene when an s-type is bound in any way.

Confidentiality

● When meeting someone outside the Kinky community environment that you know is in the scene, it is rude to acknowledge how you know them in anyway. Privacy and discretion are to be respected. All information about party activities, attendees, etc., is to be considered confidential.

Drugs and Alcohol

●  No alcohol or recreational pharmaceuticals are allowed. If you appear impaired, the management reserves the right to refuse admittance into the establishment or escort you off the premises. ●  Most dungeons and State or County laws do not allow nudity and alcohol within the same establishment; however, this varies from state to state. Additionally, most liability insurance companies will not insure a dungeon if they allow alcohol.

Optional Dungeon Rules

Pictures and Video

● Do not bring cameras or recording devices. ● Cell phone calls must be made and received outside of the play area Weapons ● No weapons (including pepper spray) or weapons can be allowed into either the play area or the premises. Some dungeons allow edge play and the will allow weapons upon inspection and special permission.

Smoking

● No smoking or glass allowed in the play area

Sex and Nudity

● No penetrative sex ● There is no nipple or genital exposure allowed in the play area.
 
DrHarmony Basic Dungeon Etiquette  

Boundary Flow Chart

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